The End is not the End...

Last weekend, I was at the end of my rope. I didn't see anyway that I could make it through this next week. I was in dire need of some good God time, because I was only getting Him in small spurts between chasing kids. I was tire, and just kept telling myself, just make it to August 3rd. I was so incredibly focused on the end of my summer missions service. I figured that I would deal with my lack of God time, lack of emotions, etc... August 3rd, which was the official end of my summer work. I knew that this wasn't the best thing, and it was Christa prioritizing logically, not letting God have control. I told Becky that I didn't have time to spend a lot of time with God, because I was so busy dealing with other people. She told me to ask Him for time. Well, I didn't, but He gave it to me anyway. I got sick.

I was sick the whole week of camp (and I still am). I feel like I just slept the whole week away. I would go to bed at 10, with my meds (which make me sleep a lot), sleep until 8, and then have a couple of hour naps during the day. Hoewever, each of these times before I went to sleep, I had some really good time with God. The week was kinda hard. This was the first camp all summer that I dealt with teenagers. I felt more like a mother than a camp counselor.
"You are not allowed to leave the cabin wearing that shirt. Those shorts are way too short. Keep your hands to yourself! You know the rules."

However, like I said, I did get to spend a lot of great time with God. One day I was reading My Utmost for His Highest. It talked about how we focus on the end of something that God has called us to, but that is not the end in God's eyes. The end is our obedience. When we are obeying what God has called us to, then that is the end. I had to focus not on August 3rd, but on my obeying God. Obedience is the end.